The Dysfunctional Family Model

There are many types of families out there – in your lifetime, you won’t only experience your own. You will also experience the families of your friends, neighbors, coworkers, romantic partners, and beyond. You may even begin (or already have) a family of your own!

Among all these different families, you will likely notice many different dynamics and inner workings that provide structure to these various family units. What works well in one household might be disastrous in another, and vice versa.

Of all the different types of families there are, one type stands out as most dangerous and unhealthy: the dysfunctional family. This family model is one that can lead to lots of issues if it is allowed to continue operating in a dysfunctional manner.

What does a dysfunctional family look like?

According to the psychology experts at VeryWell Mind, dysfunctional families typically have issues that fall into one or more of the following categories:

1. Enabling behaviors

This type of dysfunction breeds when family members are supportive of others’ bad behaviors or habits. For example, if both parents are alcoholics and support each other in drinking, they are enabling these bad habits to continue in each others’ lives.

2. Emotionally unavailable

This type of dysfunction breeds when members of the household aren’t comfortable with sharing or expressing emotions, so they withhold them from each other. Perhaps they’re too busy or caught up in themselves to express emotions or assist with other family members’ emotional dilemmas. Emotionally unavailable parents tend to live by the “children should be seen and not heard” adage, thus expecting their children to work through upset or emotional turbulence silently and independently.

3. Addiction

This is dysfunction that breeds from addictions of various types. For example, if members in a family unit are alcoholics, food addicts, smokers, drug users, shopaholics, or any other type of addict, they can be too busy chasing after their next “high” to focus on the dynamics of a healthy and thriving family.

4. Confrontational or combative

This dysfunction stems from abuse, anger issues, and difficulty with emotional regulation. In these scenarios, family members can't function normally because they live in fear of an abusive or angry person in the household. For example, they may be exposed to lots of yelling, shouting, door slamming, verbal abuse, physical abuse, attacks, and more at the hands of a confrontational or combative personality in the home.

What do these various types of dysfunctions do to a family unit?

VeryWell mind explains that dysfunctional aspects of a family tend to come in sets – typically, when a family has a “main” dysfunction, it also feeds into other negative traits as well. For example, a family with someone suffering from drug addiction may also struggle with this same person becoming confrontational or combative – perhaps this person gets emotionally unregulated when they are using.

No matter what type of dysfunction a family experiences, the effects are typically the same: the behaviors or negative traits causing the dysfunction causes the entire family system to operate in a way that isn’t good for anyone’s physical, emotional, or mental well-being.

Often, dysfunctional families will struggle to admit or acknowledge that something is wrong; instead, they’ll insist that everything is fine and continue living in a way that ignores or negates any evidence of dysfunction or wrongdoing.

In these scenarios, children’s needs often go unmet in favor of the adults’ preferences, addictions, desires, and more. VeryWell Mind experts succinctly explain that, “no parent is perfect, but in dysfunctional families, the problems in the household are ignored or denied.”

Resource:

https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-a-dysfunctional-family-5194681